So, I watched the new episode of Game of Thrones at my friend’s house, and while a lot of the episode was sort of set-up and filler (Here’s what our characters have been up to on Game of Thrones while you’ve been away!), I still enjoyed it. And—as per usual—I had thoughts. Mostly, my thoughts ran along the lines of “Is it going to bother everyone’s watching experience if I get up to pee?” and “I should have brought a box of Franzia,” but I had other thoughts too. Game of Thrones-related thoughts. In the next few posts, I’m gonna give you some of the ones I found most worth mentioning. Previous posts can be found here.
Samwell Tarly: Hogwarts Student and Shit-Taker-Outer Extraordinaire
I started to write about Arya Stark’s opening scene as my favorite thing about this episode until I remembered. And that would have been wrong. So wrong. Because this montage is undoubtedly the greatest gift GoT has ever given the world.
Lainey was the first one who really pointed out to me how wonderful this scene is. It is so completely… just ridiculous and I adore it. It at once manages to be waaaaaay too fucking much and just enough. And, as Lainey mentioned, they managed to get a really good consistency for the shit, and then the blurring between which is shit and which is soup… beautiful. This is so over the top, but in exactly the way GoT has always been over the top. All the titties, all the violence and murder, and now finally, all the shit. The circle is complete. Well-played HBO, well-played.
Other than that masterful montage of cinematic greatness, the other thing of note in Sam’s scenes was the fact that he actually seems to have wandered outside of the GoT universe and into the set of Harry Potter. Don’t get me wrong, I’m super into it, I fucking adore Harry Potter and Jim Broadbent, of Professor Slughorn fame, is a goddamned treature who manages to imbue every line with an arch sort-of gravitas (yes, I recognize the contradictory nature of that descriptor) that makes you want to really lean in and listen. Just the sort of guy you’d want to perform a little medieval autopsy action with.
It was a little frustrating hearing Broadbent-as-Archmaester that, although he does believe Sam is probably telling the truth about the White Walkers, he isn’t going to do anything about it. Like really? And then Sam’s robbery of the books and the reading and… it just all kind of has me thinking, do we have time for this? Not Sam, I mean he’s doing what he can for the cause of mankind and Jon Snow and all that, but the show itself. Does it have time to devote to Sam’s reading? I’m just getting nervous. We have a limited number of episodes left in the season and in the show. Are they going to be able to cram it all in without it feeling rushed? Because I’m starting to get nervous. Cersei is my ride-or-die for sure, but I’m not certain how much time we have to fuck around in King’s Landing without cheating the Ice Zombie Apocalypse of the time it needs to be a truly realized storyline.
The shit and soup definitely was needed though. Good call there.